Whether you have been diagnosed with a “mental disorder” or just feel something’s off

Do you exhibit any of the following?

Feeling disconnected from yourself

Problems with handling intense emotions

Sudden and unexpected changes in mood, for example feeling very sad for no reason

Depression or anxiety problems or both

If so you may be experiencing some level of DID Dissociative Identity Disorder.

Yes, these are general symptoms but my point is that dissociation effects a larger percent of our population than we think. Confronting the fact that somewhere in our unconscious minds there are stories, emotions or pieces of ourselves that have been stored away. How do we then find ourselves? In doing so we will achieve peace of mind, strength, courage, confidence and independence.

Through this blog I hope to help you help yourselves or others. I will be utilizing a Jungian framework, along with therapeutic research, and studies on the unconscious, dissociation, trauma, and society’s influence in order to put together the missing pieces.

We can become whole. We will seek truth. We will be cured.

We owe it to ourselves and our neighbors to be the best we can be.


You may have been Wrongly Diagnosed: Trauma and Dissociation

“Trauma literally means “wound, injury or shock.” In psychological terms, “traumatic events have traditionally been considered those that harm the psychological integrity of am individual.


Approximately 10-15% of adults who are exposed to an extreme stressor may develop acute stress disorder and PTSD (Bresslau, 2001). What is most traumatic are disruptions of our fundamental sense of trust and attachment, and is typically experienced as intentional rather than “an accident of nature.”

Events that are intense, sudden, and unpredictable, extremely negative and evoke a severe sense of helplessness and loss of control are more difficult to integrate. Prolonged exposure to repetitive events, such as child abuse is likely to cause the most severe and lasting effects.

Dissociation is a word that is used to describe the disconnection or lack of connection between things usually associated with eachother. Dissociated experiences are not integrated into the usual sense of self, resulting in discontinuities in conscious awareness. In severe forms of dissociation, disconnection occurs in the usually integrated functions of consciousness, memory, identity, and perception.

For example, someone may think about an event that was tremendously upsetting yet have no feelings about it (emotional numbing, a sign of PTSD). It is my hypothesis that all people with PTSD struggle with some degree of dissociation.


Someone with DID (dissociative identity disorder) can feel “taken over” by an emotion that does not seem to make sense at the time. You may feel like a “passenger” rather than a driver in your own life.


Depersonalization can be experienced as an “out of body experience.”

Derealization may be demonstrated as a sense of the world not being real.

Dissociative Amnesia- An inability to recall important information that is so extensive. Important events are forgotten such as abuse, a troubling incident, or a block of time, from minutes to years,

Dissociation can be a learned adaptive trait in the context of chronic, severe childhood trauma. Dissociation can be considered adaptive because it reduces the overwhelming distress created by trauma.

In adulthood dissociation is maladaptive as you can disconnect from events you perceive to be threatening without determining true danger. This leaves the person “spaced out” in many situations in ordinary life, and unable to protect themselves in conditions of real danger.

Dissociation is also caused by severe neglect or emotional abuse. Or because parents were unpredictable or frightening.

Results of dysregulation are difficulty tolerating and regulating intense emotional experiences.

Some studies show 2-3% of the general population suffers from DID. Some say 10%.”

Why the gap? In my next few posts I will discuss further details of dissociation, causes and why it is underdiagnosed. I will describe proper therapeutic techniques and I will share my findings while using these approaches. You may be labeled as schizophrenic, PTSD, generalized anxiety disorder, bipolar, etc, without even knowing an underlying cause of your emotional distress is due to dissociative identity disorder. This blog is here to help you help yourself.

(Most information provided from International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation). Take a look for yourself!

The Hope of Strength

There is a possibility that the government suppresses any forms of actually helping people who have a so-called illness. The drug industry is profiting off the misery of others, so wouldn’t they be pushed towards continuing, prolonging “mental illness” rather than attempting to cure it?

And don’t forget industries are directly connected to the government due to corporate lobbysists’ bribery. Mental health is a profit maker.
Whitaker also points to the facts that psychiatric medication can worsen symptoms in the long run (see Whitaker’s “Anatomy of an Epidemic”). I am BY NO means telling people to stop their meds, but I’m saying that there is an alternative route to take by utilizing DID alternate techniques in therapy while administering drugs thoughtfully.

But what we must understand is that the “conditions” we are told to be real are simply manifestations of past trauma. The dissociations we have evolved in ourselves to survive are the very pieces we need to put back together.
The system isn’t working. I was told I was “manic” for wanting to go back to grad school by my case worker. Yes, I had a caseworker, I was gaslighted, remember? I got to experience the hell of the system through the lens of a social worker and trauma survivor.
The system is not right.
It is demeaning and decreases your confidence, your sense of being independent.

This oppressive force of ignorance to facts is the main reason there are so many suffering, oppressed individuals out there. Hope is the key. Challenging the system in our own minds and perceptions. Gaining strength. Gaining peace.


The path to true happiness is the unity between all people and all concepts of self. We must fight the evils inside and outside us. We must realize the truth of DID, gain strength and confidence in order to have the best life imaginable.

Dissociation, identity and self awareness

Cognitive dissonance connects to dissociation in the manner that one self learns to disconnect the primary self in order to maintain order and preserve the self, especially in intense trauma.
In the following passage I will describe the most intense example of traumatic abuse which creates the grotesquely under diagnoses of Dissociative Identity Disorder.
“… Beta programming is a combination of Alpha programming (overall rewiring of one’s neural mechanics necessary for any form of more specific programming) and beta primordial (primitive mind) sex programming. This program eliminates learned moral convictions and stimulates the primitive part of the brain (the hindbrain) in order to perpetuate inhibitionless sexual instincts. This training program (usually for women) is for developing the “ultimate prostitute” a sex machine. Ideally a programmer will get their hands on a victim before they turn 3. Why? When you are young your brain is in a state of plasticity. This does not mean simply that you would learn from certain experiences as adults do, but rather that the very neural pathways which are responsible for all your senses and behaviors are still growing and forming new connections. The goal of practitioners of trauma based mind control is to change the way these neurons, axons, synapses, etc grow and which of them connect with which others. Given this practice is an ancient one, probably stemming from the mystery religions of Ancient Greece, the practice must require no modern technology.
This is consistent with what survivors of trauma based mind control (TBMC) have testified to victims are sleep deprived, water, food, light, and other bare necessities for days on end. During these times the victim will also be tortured.
The most effective methods are believed to be those that consist of inflicting moderate amounts of pain over extended periods of time. Emotional trauma is also important.

The horrific experiences victims are exposed to result in their mind utilizing a defense mechanism called DISSOCIATION. Dissociation consists of the victims consciousness detaching from their bodies (or so it seems to them). The result is a euphoric floating feeling. It’s this feeling that attracts people to extreme forms of bondage which can induce euphoria via intense pain.

Programming begins to fail around the age 30 and results in severe depression and a “mental breakdown” for the primary personality.
I was exposed to this extreme form of programming. Due to the severity of the events I can not recall scenes but only flashes in my mind of a babysitter in this context. These reemerging images came from deep therapeutic exploration. As of late, along with meeting with a psychologist who adheres strongly to the idea of DID in the masses, I am simply using knowledge to gain a healthy and productive sex life. To have DID it does not mean you have to, for example, be Mary, baby Mary and Farmer Mike. You could be just like me, a person with a terrible memory and an inability to recount my childhood. Or you could simply be someone who experienced one traumatic event which caused symptoms of DID which are hidden quietly in the depths of your perception.
Again, DID caused by Beta programming only serves as the most drastic form of abuse which stimulates dissociation.
We can utilize this knowledge to show how any survivors of any level/type of abuse can be considered as having any measure of DID it is my proposal that many trauma survivors have on some level dissociation of self. Therapists must gain awareness of this fact and utilize techniques which can facilitate a unity between all senses of self.
Self awareness can surmount once we confront past events which we are scared of. And the personal, familial and social ramifications of this endeavor may be great. But in order to create unity within one self, we must be self aware. We must gain confidence. We must be free.
I will be tracking my findings of my readings of Carl Jung, unconscious memories, dissociation, dissonance and therapeutic accounts on this blog. Please open your mind to new thoughts on treatment and the reality of DID in the majority of patients.

Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive dissonance occurs when you are forced to say or do something in which you do not believe.
As Wikipedia states: In psychology, cognitive dissonance is the excessive mental stress and discomfort[1] experienced by an individual who (1) holds two or more contradictory beliefs, ideas, or values at the same time or (2) is confronted by new information that conflicts with existing beliefs, ideas, or values. Included, stress and discomfort may also arise within an individual who holds a belief and performs a contradictory action or reaction.”
“Festinger proposed that the greater the discomfort, the greater the desire to reduce the dissonance of the two cognitive elements” (Harmin
Jones and Mills, 1999).
“Dissonance theory suggests that if individuals act in ways that contradict their beliefs, then they typically will change their beliefs to align with their actions (or vice versa).

Uncovering our memories and gaining strength

The unconscious memories we suppress are the key to our personal salvation. I know someone with schizophrenia who uses her diagnosis as an excuse to not do the things she needs in order to thrive.
Not only do our neighbors oppress us with stigma, but we oppress ourselves. It is an intricate model that self perpetuates. The system creates profits while it utilizes it’s professionals to demean us. Stigma is produced by social workers (I used to be one). They make fun of their clients and create a distance through professionalism and dependency. They tell us all we can’t succeed. Self realization will give us personal freedom and strength.